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Phillip Seymour Hoffman - O Fortuna, velut luna, statu variabilis, Semper crescis aut decrescis, vita detestabilis. Nunc obdurat et tunc curat ludo mentis aciem. Egestatem, potestatem dissolvit ut glaciem. - Whahey! 
Jeremy Clarkson - Vrooooooooommmm! That was the best shag... ...in the wooooorld.
Alan Bennett - Nnnnnggggh! I've always been of the opinion that semen is a queer substance. My mother would never had stood for it. Not in the front room leastways and certainly not over the Peak Freans Quality Biscuit Assortment.
John Virgo - Where's the white going!
Michael Winner - 'Calm down dear, it's only my sex piss'
Barry Chuckle - To yooooooooooooouuuuu!!!
Stephen Hawking - Ugf - 7rf0-q423! !fla io ]1[ktmmsd ... help...55fd
Kenneth Wolstenholme -- She thinks it's all over ... IT IS NOW!!!!!
Noddy Holder - IT'S J-I-I-I-I-ZZ -
MAS!
Scooby Doo - Grrrr....Rurr ...Arooooo ..... Ranks Raggy.......
Steve Davis - Oh. I've come.
Stephen Fry - hnngggh-ugh, ho, ha... well then. Lovely. *sips tea*
Oz Clarke - Hmmmmmm, yessssss, I'm getting semen, with a slight hint of regret.
Mark E Smith - My load has just been shot-ugh, it's all over-ugh, so temporary-ugh, the midgets have taken my toaster-ugh, I live in Manchester-ugh.
Jack Tweed - Think of the money...think of the money...oh..oh..HUUURRRGGHH!
Patrick Moore - ...and we should be able to see it shooting over Uranus any minute now... ooyah...
Gordon Ramsay - Ugh Ugggh Now Clean Your Twat Up.
Brian Blessed - UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK I HAVE FUCKING COME! FEEL MY COCKFISH SWIM TO THEIR DEATH!!! HA HA HA HA!
Eddie Waring --- Aarruugh aaaghrruugh aarrugh you're in for a pearly bath!
David Attenborough - Now...if we're quiet..fnnnk...we should be able to hear...hunnfff...the seminal fluid of the male of the species...URHGGH...going right up your twat, darling...hurm...TWNNFFFFT...aaah...and there we have it.
Gordon Brown - nnnnnnnnnh!!, I think the right honorable lady will find that that is a 10% increase year on year in the amount of semen produced, and that the conservatives intend to cut sperm production year-on year. Oh god, please wake up. Fuck.
Stanley Unwin - Ugh, my supersuper semenlode has explody-wise deposified in your cunnyfolde, Ugh. Deep joy!
David Tennant - UHHHHHHHHHH I'm sorry. So, so sorry.
Chris Eubank... It appearth one ith about to - how thall one phrathe it? - bethtow upon oneth thpouthe, oneth prethiouth themen.
Ronnie Corbett - Ugh...oof....that reminds me of the old joke about the actress and the vet with three hands.
Jeremy Paxman....ooof ugggghh....Come on...come on....oh dear.....
Arthur Bostrom - Ugh ugh I have jazzed in your funny..
Tom Paulin - "oh dear, that's so mediooocre, just terribly, terribly aaaverage,I keep asking myself 'where is the paaasion?'... OH CHRIST YOU JUST STUCK YOUR FINGER UP ME ERSE YOU DIRTY BITCH! HERE COMES MY MILKY WHITE LATE REVIEW!"
Michael Barrymore - "ughh ugh, that was alwight, fancy a swim?"
Alan Hansen - Right into the box! Unbelievable!
Boris Johnson - Oooh, gosh, erm, well, erm, gosh, er, erm, gosh, er, um, crikey, well, er... who are you again?
Sooty - ............................... What's that, Sooty? You've shot your load into Su's furry panda fadge? Bye bye, everybody. Bye bye.
Jim Bowen - Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhnnn one!!! It's an orgasm.
Bill Gates - Bill's semen is trying to access your face. Bill needs your permission to continue. Cancel? Too late...uuuugh. Transfer complete.
Gary Glitter - Ugh Ugggnnnghh....There you are, a packet of Pokemon cards.
Lenny Henry - ugh ugh ugh oooooooooooooooookaaaaayyyyy!!!!!!!! Katanga Katanga...
Magnus Magnusson - Uuuuunggghhh..I've started so I'll finish...unngh
Anthony Perkins - UUUUGGHHH!!!!! Oh God, Mother! Spunk! Spunk! CLEAN IT UP NORMAN. CLEAN IT UP NOW.
Dean Lerner - awfully sorry but the seed of my loins appears to be obscuring your vision. Hankerchief?
Bob Holness - here comes your Gold Run and UNNGH that's Cockbusters!
5,4,3,2,1 ungh! - Manfred Mann
I have also, ummmmmmmmmm, done some brown ejaculate from ayyyyyy-nurrrr-ther place - Emo Philips
Mike Reid - Ger, ger, ger, ger, ger, GOO!
Ronnie Barker ....Ugggghhhh.
And it's good bye from me.
Granville fetch your cloth
Jimmy Savile - eurgh eurgh eurgh - goodness gracious, how's about that then? Yes, alright, I'll leave the morgue now.
Norman Wisdom - Ugh, I'm delivering the milk Mr Grimsdale, Ugh, Mr Gimsdale!, Ugh Ugh Ugh, MR GRIMSDALE!!!!
Tony Green - ...And Bullies Special Priiiize!
Simon Cowell : Well, that was distinctly average ; you didn't even squeeze your twat muscles together around my pompous penis.
Tim Westwood: OK HOMIE, IM ABOUT TO UNLEASH THE DEMON THAT IS MY WELSH MAN GRAVY, GET READY FOR IT BABY, ITS COMING... ITS COMING... PAOW!!!
ON MA GRIND... AIIIIIIIIGHT
Lenny Henry: Dawn, you fat fucking twat, why didn't you tell me I was filling your belly button with sperm
Michael Jackson - OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH
Barry Scott - BANG! And the squirt is gone...
Jasper Carrott....uggghh....I'm opening my Goldenballs!!
Buster Bloodvessel -- Ne Ne Na Na Na Na Noo Noo!!
Sir Alan Suger -- Ugh...oof.... I'm fired!
Chris Kamara - Oh! It's unbelievable Geoff, GEOFF, it's UNBELIEVABLE!
James Hetfield: Yeeaaaaaa-AH!
Dean Gaffney - uuurrrgghhhh! Well Ard!!!
Alan Sugar - Ugh..ugh...uuuuuugggghhhhh!!!!!! I've fired.
Gerard Butler - Uggggghhhhh....THIS...IS...SPUNKA!!!!!!!!!
Russell Brand - Uh..uh..UUUURRGGHHH!!! Wait til I tell your old grandad about our little fucky-wuck. He'll LOVE it.
Russell T Davies - 'If you don't like it then tough, I've delivered'
'Whispering' Ted Lowe - Ohhhh, and thaaat's just about perrrrfect!
Michael Jackson - Eeee-heeeeee. Time for a blanket wash! Come on Blanket, in the bath son.
Gordon the Gopher - squeak...squeak...squeak squeak squeak squeaksqueaksqueak SQUEEEEEEEEAK!!!!! Tissue, love?
Paul Daniels - "And that's magic!"
Jiminy Cricket - Heeee, he HAH, hee Ooooooo Hahhhh! In your face Pinocchio!
Neil Armstrong - it's one small spaff for man urghhhh splot. One giant spaff on your behind.
Noel Edmonds : Two balls, one penis.... just one question ::: squeal or no squeal?
Jamie Oliver: OO Aahh sss soooo saahhh SAINNNNNNNNNSBURYS
Roy Walker - It's good, but IT'S NOT RIGHT!
Bruce Forsyth - Nice to shag you, "To shag you - Nice!"
Les Dennis - If it's up there you're going home with the money.
."And there's more." - Jimmy Cricket
Katie White — "That's not my name!"
Geronimo - Um-yes, um-yes, um-christ, um-yes, um-god, Uuurrgghhh. Meeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Noel Edmunds - Uh, uh, can you open your box, please.
Arsene Wenger - I didn't see that incident of intercourse. That is not my penis in that childs rear. When my best boys are back everything will be good again.
